daf | bill bailey

despite the earlier setbacks, tonight's comedy offering was pretty damned sweet.

after arriving late [my fault] at the wrong tube station [my fault] we got a taxi to hammersmith in good time to grab a place right at the front of the queue.

we sat down, close enough to the stage to hear bill's asthmatic wheezing and to watch each and every glistening bead of sweat that formed on his forehead from inception to brow wiping demise.

but, just before the start of the show, some idiot dropped their phone underneath the tiered seating.

as the show was being recorded, they went and told the usher who was evidently making sure no one attempted to storm the stage and pay impromptu homage to the comedic maestro we were there to see.

so, anyway despite the potential havoc of having an unanswerable phone ringing during the show, bill strolls on stage and begins his show. 5 minutes in, announces that some numpty had dropped their phone under the seats and then asked them to shout out the number so he could call it.

they did, he did... sadly, the phone was on silent.

not particularly funny or noteworthy, i know. but, i do now have bill bailey's number.

other highlights included the assortment of bizarre heckles¹ the best of which was person who gave bill a pint of lager at the start of the show repeatedly insisting that he consumed the beverage.

the tube ride home was interesting, i got befriended by some muppet that insisted on talking shit at me until he got off the train.

1. ie. "nice bush" ; "i'm a vet, i'll have a look at your foot"